Friday marked the third meeting with the caregivers, and disappointingly none of the sisters showed up. We first discussed the "challenge" from the past week of giving more praise and encouragement for specific things the children do. Most of them agreed it was easy to integrate this concept but they sometimes just forget. They also commented on the positive reactions from the children when they receive this feedback. So, we're off to a good start, but as always, there is room for growth. I encouraged them to continue with this strategy, and to remember to be specific when admiring their behaviors.
This week's lesson entailed strategies to improve instruction-giving. Many of the strategies seem very unnatural and require controlling impulses and reactions to situations-- this I know through implementing them with children I babysit. However, they definitely work when done correctly and consistently. Some of the strategies that were a review for the caregivers were politely telling, not asking, a child to do something otherwise it seems more like a choice; telling the children what to do, not what not to do; and praising a child when he/she complies. While these ideas had been presented to them before, a reminder never hurts! A couple of new concepts I presented that are critical to instruction-giving include only saying the instructions once (REALLY challenging!), having the child(ren) repeat the instructions, and calmly asking questions when a child does not comply (e.g. What did I tell you to do?, Do you understand the instructions?). The phrase, "first ____, then _____" was also introduced as an easy way to keep instructions simple and positive. I composed a few role plays and case scenarios based on various situations I observed, and the caregivers seemed to really enjoy talking through these. Hopefully I'll see some of the strategies implemented throughout this next week!
Because the sisters did not attend the meeting I wanted to somehow convey the information to them. Each week I create 5 "take-home points" based on the lesson and write them on a dry-erase board in the room. So I decided to type these and print them out for each of the sisters. This morning I distributed them to three of the sisters; two seemed happy to receive the information while one seemed rather apathetic. Maybe as the weeks go along they will want to join the meetings to gain more information about what is written on the paper. Or maybe I'll come up with a more creative way to increase their attendance, and subsequently their willingness to attempt to change.
As mentioned in the previous post, the policial environment here definitely caught me off-guard. There is a clear hierarchy among the caregivers and sisters, and even a hierarchy amongst the sisters. Unfortunately the sisters sit higher up than the caregivers and employ worse strategies. This means little confrontation can occur when the caregivers see the sisters using a poor strategy; although the caregivers frequently do this amongst themselves (and would like to do be able to do it with the sisters). It also means little confrontation can occur within the ranks of the sisters, even though Sister Marisa has tried on multiple occasions. Knowing that I can do little to breakdown this hierarchy, I am struggling to find a way to work with it. Anybody with any sage advice or bright ideas please feel free to share!
Next week we will begin our program with the children. For this I am very excited-- I have much more patience with children and much more confidence in their ability to change their behaviors. Undoubtedly it will still be a challenging endeavor and very trying at times. Our plan is to divide the children into groups (probably 4-5) and do an activity with a group in the morning and a group in the afternoon. This will put them on a sort of rotating schedule that will allow both us and them some breathing room. I created a calendar of activities (obviously fairly flexible) with a theme for each month: June is "listening", July is "teamwork", August is "helping", and September is "respect". A short lesson and fun catch-phrases will remind them of these important concepts as we utilize the therapeutic play activities. On Friday I ordered a parachute for the children-- something unfamiliar to them that is both extremely fun and extremely beneficial for teaching listening and teamwork skills.
Another variable I wanted to consider were the children travelling to Italy for 1-2 weeks at various points in the summer. This exciting change in environment has the potential to be both beneficial and unbeneficial for the children. Beneficial to receive reprieve from a stressful environment, as well as more individual attention and solitary time. Unbeneficial to get a glimpse of life in a family situation and then return back to the orphanage. In order to attempt some semblance of consistency with the principles we will be teaching the children I decided to create a handout for the Italian families. With a short explanation of the behavioral changes we are targeting and simple strategies the families should consider, I hope the transition back to Casa Sperantei will not set the children back as much. Only time will tell.
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