It felt great to be back working with the children again! While I would love to work with two groups each day, I'm thankful for the time I have with them amidst their busy schedules. These next several weeks (starting this past week) will focus on teamwork and the importance of cooperating. To facilitate this idea I designed partner relay races that consisted of "wheelbarrows", "leap frog", and tossing a ball; some of the children also participated in "over-under". At the end the children who behaved appropriately played games with the parachute. Of the four groups, the youngest seem to have the most difficulty with behaviors; not to mention a cascade effect happens when one begins to misbehave. In response Iulia and I have made three rules the children must follow: 1.) We keep our hands and feet to ourselves, 2.) We use nice words, and 3.) We play the entire game. Right now it feels like we spend more time addressing poor behaviors than actually participating in playing games. Unfortunately this difficult aspect of the job must be done if something is going to change in the children. As imaginable the language barrier makes the task even more difficult because I cannot properly attend to a misbehaving child or conduct the group unless Iulia assists me. This leaves the other children who are behaving left in-limbo, seemingly punished as well. We continue to press the issue of caregivers attending the groups to help with this aspect; sometimes they come, sometimes they don't. However, I have observed that the children respond remarkably well to positive feedback-- much better than trying to attend to poor behaviors. For example, when several children are sitting quietly in the circle and a few others are goofing off, I begin to praise those "sitting nicely and listening" by name and the others almost immediately fix their behaviors to receive this attention. Definitely a recommended strategy to utilize!
In order to better facilitate the groups for this upcoming week we decided to mix the ages of the children; this way the older ones can help the younger ones. Obviously playing fairly with children your own age is important, but we must first establish some foundational concepts. With this arrangement we hope the older children will feel a sense of responsibility to act as a role model and helper towards the younger ones; and we hope the younger ones will observe positive behaviors displayed by the older children. We cannot predict how these groups will turn out, especially with so many ill-behaved children across ages, but it is worth a try.
During the beginning of the group sessions I had the children assist me in reviewing the rules (for mealtime and bedtime) we created together. For the older children I had them take turns reading the rule and then acting out what that rule looks like. Select rules were discussed more in depth because of their importance (e.g. "We listen to the caregivers and sisters"-- you must listen all the time (not just when you want) and the first time). The little ones had the rules read to them, they pointed to the corresponding pictures, and then they acted them out. One day mid-week Iulia and I reviewed the rules for the table before lunchtime and hung them in the dining room. Each week we will return to the dining room at lunch to review the rules as more children begin to return from Italy. On Friday we hung the rules for bedtime in their respective places. We encouraged the caregivers to review the rules repeatedly the first couple weeks to serve as a reminder for the children.
Aside from our group time I played one-on-one with about 15 children; some for the first time, some for the second time. Graciously the volunteers showed flexibility in allowing me to do this, recognizing its importance to the child. Each time I come looking for a specific child several others latch onto me and beg to come play. I must explain that all the children take a turn before they come again. They love this time of respite, freedom, and special attention. I enjoy teaching the children new games and challenging them to think creatively; not to mention addressing some concerns. A couple children wanted to play on the computer, so I allowed them this privilege the last 15 min. of our time together. They struggled with maneuvering the mouse and clicking the appropriate buttons because of their limited exposure to using a computer. It will be fun to teach them these skills so important in our technological world.
As a continuation from last week, the meeting with the caregivers and sisters (or sister, rather) focused on behavioral strategies. First I had them play a "game" where they had to match scenarios with the corresponding appropriate response based on concepts we discussed thus far. After successfully completing this task they went around and read one of the pairs and we talked about whether they have tried the strategy, their success in using it, or barriers to them not using it. From their responses it seems many of them have integrated several strategies into their routines (some of which I have observed) and reported success with them most of the time. Undoubtedly some use the strategies more than others and all of them could use the strategies more consistently, but I cannot overlook their willingness to at least try-- after all there is always something to complain about. Hopefully the children recognize the difference in their behaviors as well.
Some of the concepts I introduced during the lesson were giving choices, following through on punishment warnings, and giving time-outs. While some children receive threats for their ill-behavior (e.g. not going to the pool) the caregivers rarely hold the children accountable. In this way the children know they can behave poorly without actually receiving any negative consequences (besides being yelled at, which isn't much of a deterrent to most). The caregivers say they feel bad for singling out the child, which is understandable-- yet I emphasized that if the behavior is going to stop they must face this difficult challenge. Time-outs are a fairly new concept here as well that I think can benefit the children who display large issues such as hitting or kicking others violently. Again, I highlighted that consistency and persistency must be used with time-outs for them to be effective. Two videos on YouTube from "Supernanny" served as useful tools to demonstrate the important steps associated with time-outs. I'm interested to hear their feedback on using this technique next week.
I can say that I am pleased with the progress being made with the caregivers yet there is much more to be made. On a daily basis I find it easy to become annoyed or perturbed with small behaviors from the caregivers, but I need to keep in mind that addressing the biggest concerns must come first. The same can be said of the children. Giddy-up!
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