My apologies for not posting last week. The internet was down all weekend and I got behind on many things, this blog included.
The past two weeks have been a roller coaster ride of progress and frustration-- no surprises there. With only four weeks left here I'm beginning to realize how many things on my "to-do" list have not been accomplished and how many other things are only starting to take shape. And to add to that imminence Iulia will be out for the next two weeks due to her upcoming wedding. While I cannot blame her for taking this time off it definitely puts a damper on implementing several activities with the children and impedes with our consistency. Luckily we will still meet with the pairs doing the anger management sessions on Monday and Tuesday and we'll have the caregiver meeting on Tuesday.
For the children's activities the past weeks we did the following:
1.) "Sleeping Bear"-- One child sits on a chair blindfolded with a whistle underneath. The other children take turns trying to creep up on the 'bear' to steal the whisle and blow it three times. If the child is caught by the bear another child takes a turn. If the child is successful he/she becomes the new bear. It's a great game for listening, taking turns, and patience. After awhile I had two children go at the same time to elicit teamwork skills. The kids LOVED this simple game and continually ask to play it again. Success!
2.) Chalk Buddies-- One child lays on the ground while the other child traces him/her with sidewalk chalk. They switch places so their 'chalk buddies' are next to each other. Then they write something nice in a word bubble to the other person, and/or have the buddies sharing a toy, etc. Finally a face and clothes can be added. This activity forced them to work cooperatively together, use nice words to each other, and think about the principles of sharing (not to mention they had to share the sidewalk chalk). All the children giggled when they were being traced and very much enjoy using chalk.
3.) Kids as Leaders-- We selected two children who went to a camp in Italy to teach a game/song/craft to the other children. Towards the end of the session we switched and gave the children who stayed here a chance to teach a game/song they learned. Needless to say some groups were facilitated much better than others. It was encouraging to see some positive leadership skills from both the children who stayed here and those who went to Italy. When reflecting on this experience, the children were able to see how frustrating some of their behaviors can be. It also showed me how far we still have to go.
Iulia and I continue to make progress in meeting with pairs of children for anger management. Aside from simply bringing attention to their feelings and reactions we have seen some minor positive changes in their responses to frustrating situations (i.e. not hitting/kicking/swearing/yelling). [Unfortunately this is even more difficult when the child can hear a sister in the next room yelling at children who are doing homework.] We've used social stories and puppets to retell a situation where the child became angry or frustrated and had a negative response. Then they must retell the story with an alternative positive response (e.g. playing together, walking away, ignoring, telling an adult). Now we need to be present in their daily play to facilitate the transfer of this concept to real life (as well as teach the caregivers how to do this). Another activity we've done is teach them emotional regulation strategies such as taking 5 deep breaths, squeezing fingers and toes, putting something in the mouth, closing eyes/turning away, and thinking of something funny. The first three seem to be the preferred methods for the children-- we'll see if they actually implement them!
The past two meetings for the caregivers/sisters only the caregivers have attended. Last Friday I talked about common psychological issues that tend to arise in orphanages: ADHD, depression, and anxiety. In the beginning I had them do an activity that simulated what it might be like for children who have ADHD. Some of these concepts have been taught previously because of Iulia's background as a psychologist, but it's always good to reinforce them. Afterwards I gave them strategies to use with children who struggle with symptoms of ADHD, especially during homework time. These include setting clear expectations, using a timer, taking a 5 min. break every 20 min., removing distractions from the room, breaking the task into smaller parts, and using a therapy ball as a seat. They all seemed eager to try these methods because many of the children struggle with sitting still and completing a task.
This past Tuesday I discussed adolescent development and changes the caregivers should anticipate in the next couple years. I want them to start thinking about this now so they can start to develop ideas and strategies to address these issues. Many new daily occupations arise in adolescence and somebody needs to be there a.) to teach them these occupations, and b.) to listen/talk to them about their feelings and questions. It's also important that they designate a male figure that the boys can approach with questions. I'm hoping that one of the maintenance workers will be willing to take on this role (we're going to ask him first then let the boys know he can be a resource for them). Most importantly I stressed the need for the caregivers to guide the adolescents through decision-making and not simply berate their actions. This challenge takes more time and patience but has much greater outcomes in the end.
Ugh. It's been a long week and I am glad to see the weekend. I'm trying to focus on the positive improvements I've been seeing, but it's so difficult when the negatives are so evident. With four weeks left there is still plenty of time for change. Not to mention plenty of time to share love and enouragement. The ride's not over yet!
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